Say Hello to Cybil

I don't know how or why it started, but for most of my life I have lived for others. Maybe it was a childhood defense mechanism against feeling scrapes from rollerblading or avoiding kisses from over zealous elders. If I avoided feeling anything, I was untouchable. Or perhaps I wanted to be the epitome of a perfect child, of everything my parents ever dreamed. I was an accident baby, so the least I could do was smile at my mother's laundry ruining abilities and chuckle at my father's sophomoric pranks. I mostly did what I was supposed to do. All of the ingredients for a perfect existence were sprinkled into the spread of my life. And yet the mix was sour.

I have lived a life of two opposing ideals. One side of me conforms and follows the well-trodden path of comfort while the other side of creativity and rebellion screams to run off into the weeds. People need challenge and stimulation, otherwise why even exist? How long can an individual go without recognizing and acting upon what does and does not bring one's existence to the foreground? I have let more than enough sunrises pass.

This forum will be dedicated to critical thinking and reflection. To happily embracing the outrageous and sometimes bizarre side of oneself and the world. To a life worth living.

-Cybil Disobedience